At one show, I had a puppy in a carrier that I was delivering after the show. A friend of mine was watching after my things while I worked with a judge. A child kept sitting on my carriers and she had to repeatedly ask him not to. Then he took the puppy out without permission. All of this was done in full sight of the parents. This sort of thing makes a show very uncomfortable. I don't go to shows to have to deal with other people's children and neither does my friend. And we are still both baffled at the behavior (or lack thereof) of the parents.
Often the parents are tied up showing rabbits and don't notice the behavior. As a parent of four, I know that I had to learn to tune out racket just to survive. I simply don't hear as much as other people do. And people certainly vary in how much rowdiness they tolerate. Obviously, people vary in what they think it is okay for their kids to do, too.
Rabbit shows are multi-generational and that's one of their strengths. In a world where kids go to school and adults go to work, kids go to soccer, adults socialize together, we simply don't have enough multi-generational activities in our society. Rabbits shows are one place where we can enjoy the different generations and learn to appreciate them.
So how do we accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative?
Rabbit shows are generally very casual and it's not necessary to behave as if you are at a tea party. But what are the expectations?
First of all, I think that the host club has to set the expectations. The expectations can be communicated in a non-threatening, positive way. Compare these two:
- We expect children to walk inside the showroom and stay on the floor. The bleachers are off-limits today. There is an area outside where children can run and yell. Please know where your children are and what they are doing throughout the day.
- If I catch your children running or yelling, I will call them down. If they don't quit, you will be asked to leave. Last year they left a huge mess and that's not going to happen this year.
Second, now that parents know what is expected at this show, they should make sure that their children follow the rules. Especially if you are the type of parent who will not allow anyone else to correct your child, you must take responsibility and ensure their compliance with expectations.
Third, well, I have to say that yes, I'm a Democrat, and yes, I think it takes a village. But when you speak to someone else's children, you still have no right to berate or threaten. Generally with children, if you simply state the rules and make a request, they will comply. They just forget to walk and forget to use an indoor voice.
A child was outside a show once wielding some sort of large tool. Several adults were concerned and somehow I got elected to speak to the child (still not sure how that happened). Anyway, I simply asked him if his parents knew what he was doing. He said, "yes," which surprised me. But at that moment his father walked up and told him to put down the tool.
Fourth (and maybe this should have been first) a club, while not required to do so, may want to think of activities for children. A show day is a long time to wait, especially if the child just has a few rabbits to show. I've seen videos set up at shows. Games can be arranged. Educational activities can be planned. Crayons and coloring sheets may be the answer, depending on the age group.
My children always pack a bag when they are traveling. It may have books, toys, pencils and paper, or other items in it. That gives them something to occupy themselves no matter when they might find some down time.
Yes, I still have to remind Anna not to run on the risers. I check with her to make sure she's not climbing on equipment. I tell her when she cannot participate in some game that I believe is bothering rabbits or exhibitors. And sometimes, she might need someone else to remind her of the rules. No one is perfect. But I feel that I do my part to keep her from becoming an issue. And I hope that other parents would do the same thing.
We can all work together by setting realistic expectations, providing children with acceptable alternative activities, watching our own children, and, if the need arises to speak to someone else's child, speaking without threats or anger.
Laurie
¶ 10:19 AM
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